In a year like 2020 it may be impossible to identify the one stress that ultimately found you in the middle of divorce. Combatting a pandemic, job loss, financial stress, never ending hurricanes, and the countless other phenomena that have caused even the most average of humans to explain 2020 with a hashtag. Now here you are staring the holidays in the face and probably wishing we could just skip ahead and jump right into 2021. Since time travel is not an option and burying your head in the sand until it all passes likely is not a choice either then I would suggest these tips to help manage the short period of 2020 we all have left to survive.
- Find the good!
My preschool aged children are memorizing a verse for Sunday church, “Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good”. (Psalm 107:1) When we are faced with challenges it is so easy to focus on only that, and then tack on all the other things that are also going wrong. I’m not suggesting you should put on a happy face and pretend your divorce is not happening or that it is easy, but I am suggesting that you instead try to focus on the good things in your life. Each morning think of ONE thing you are thankful for and instead CHOOSE to focus on that the remainder of your day.
- Treat Yourself
The holidays are a wonderful time to connect with family and friends, but it is also a time we tend to run ourselves ragged trying to do for everyone else. It is so easy to forget about caring for ourselves in a time that is all about giving. It is ok to give a little to yourself as well. Consider a spa day or a lunch date with girlfriends. Find the thing that calms you and make sure it is added to the calendar.
- Choose to Celebrate your way
You may not be celebrating the Holidays the same way this year but that is okay. Consider making new traditions and reinvent how you celebrate. If you will be spending Christmas day without your children for the first time, then find another way to celebrate YOUR WAY. During a pandemic you may have to be a little more creative in your festivities, but just roll with it, you may enjoy something new more than you expected.
You may have been dreading the time between Halloween to New Year’s this year but trying the steps above may make it a little more bearable. For more tips and financial guidance in your divorce contact us, your Certified Divorce Financial Analyst®, at Next Step Divorce Solutions.
Author – Tessa Elrod CFP®, CDFA®